If we were serious about making things work in the longer term, we had to persuade our family and friends that this was the real deal and we couldn't do that without believing it ourselves. Before long, all that talking paid off and because we became completely confident in the strong foundations of our relationship, others did too. To anyone who sees us together, it is very obvious how deeply in love we are. Unlikely as it seems, there are advantages to a relationship with a big age difference too.
Would you date someone who is 30 years OLDER?
Knowing we will never celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary means that we don't have time to waste. We make the most of every day and refuse to get caught up in the petty arguments that consume many couples. Young lives up to his name and has more energy and drive than most people — he often jokes that my maturity and his immaturity mean we meet somewhere in the middle and are just like an ordinary couple in their 40s.
I'm not sure that's quite accurate, we are a good balance in terms of our personalities and bring out the best in each other. Once we were both fully committed to the relationship, we decided we might as well really go for it and pack as much into our lives together as possible. Almost exactly a year after we started dating, Young whisked me off to Paris for a long weekend.
In that sense, the emotional ups and downs of our relationship are much like those of any other couple. We were both very strong, independent people with interesting things going on in our lives. When Young met my mother for the first time, less than a year earlier, he told her we were having fun but that there would be "no cottage, no marriage, and certainly no babies".
Would you date someone who is 30 years OLDER? - guyQ by AskMen
It felt as if we had come a very long way, very quickly. Our post-engagement anxiety was short-lived and seven months later, friends and family surrounded us for our wedding day. It really was the happiest day of my life. My father, who is relieved to be older than my husband, if only by six months, gave a moving speech, noting that even before I'd told him about Young he knew there was someone special in my life because every time we spoke on the phone I had "bubbles in my voice". I was surprised on the day to realise that I had no nerves, just a calm feeling that this was absolutely the right thing.
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When Young began his vows, we locked eyes and the only way I got through mine without wobbling was by holding his gaze. We had only changed the chaplain's suggested wording in one way — instead of "Until death do us part" we said "For as long as we both shall live". We were determined that our marriage should reflect our general attitude towards life, and we wanted to emphasise the positives.
Our son, Tom, arrived around 18 months later and having a child has made our "live for the moment" philosophy even more pertinent.
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I'll say it so you don't have to — my husband is probably going to die while our son is still pretty young. Although knowing him as I do, I wouldn't put money on that. His current stance is that he would be happy if he lived to 95, which is another 33 years. I'm holding out for Again, we knew that having a child was an enormous decision, and we talked about it endlessly, making sure that we were doing it for the right reasons and not purely selfish ones.
We knew we could provide a safe, happy and loving home for a baby, but how would we work things out financially in the future, given the different stages we were at in our careers?
How would our child cope if his daddy's health declined? How would I manage if I ended up being a carer for my child and husband? You will be 36 and looking at at least 30—34 more years of work, and they'll be looking to spend their days in retirement. When you're only 40, you may be caring for a 70 year old at home who has trouble getting around, or even tjat got sick and needs more care than you can give at home. When you're 65, instead of spending your retirement hand in hand with your partner, there's a good chance you'll be a widow. By 70, you won't be side by side on a bench in the park.
It may not seem like a huge gap now, but it may affect your entire future. The father of a close acquaintance of mine who is 65 is dating a woman who is And they seem pretty happy. As long as you are over 18, date whoever you like and do whatever makes you happy. Some people will judge you but life is too short to let judgemental folks ruin your day. Many years ago, I fell in love with a lady 29 years older than me. The short story is that even though she was perfect in every way back then when I , and knowing myself to have the wanderlust, I decided to spare us both the heartache of my cheating on her as she got older when the physical appearances would be even more apparent.
The thing is that I still think of her fondly and if my older mind could be transplanted into that younger me, sometimes I think I would have stayed.
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But even though that me might have stayed, would that have been really the right choice? But would I go out with a person 30 years older than me? If my wife would let me, sure. But would I seriously consider them for a mate? This all depends on the dynamics of the 2 people. If you get a life time of happiness that's awesome, but half the people divorce after 5—10 years.
So I'd say if the other person lives a very healthy lifestyle, no serious illness mental or physical and you think you can get at least 15—20 happy years go for it. But at the end it really depends on all your options in front of you. If you meet the exact same person 20 years Younger then you'd pick that one. So you need to make your own decisions.
We don't know what options you have in front of you. Are you the bachelorette with 25 guys to choose from?
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The man who left the system is not the same as the man who entered. You could wind up being a nurse to a geriatric person with a lot of health problems. On the other hand, anyone can develop serious health problems at any age, and you could wind up taking care of them—you never know, in life.
There are obvious differences between 18—48 relationship and 60— As long as both of you are sincere and open to the potential issues why shouldn't you? Of course if there are financial considerations, job opportunities or other utilitarian angles than definitely not.
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He's not my father, he's my husband
Ask New Question Sign In. Is it okay to date someone who is 30 years older than me? It can be ok, depending. Good luck, whichever way you decide to go. Is it okay to fall in love with someone who is 30 years older than me? Would you date someone 20 years older than you? Quora User , studied Digital Media Design. The must-play city building game this year. Advance through historical ages and into the future in this award-winning game.